amble is a newsletter about practicing a life of presence
Hi there! I’m Maria. And I used to think that my career was my whole identity. I was always “at work”, plotting the future or solving problems. I only knew how to talk about work. I had no real hobbies or deep interests outside of work. I was absent-minded with my loved ones. I half-assed most attempts at self-care.
All that changed in late 2021, when I hit a wall. I was “at work” even when I wanted to actively disconnect. On edge, overwhelmed, reactive. I couldn’t ever turn my brain off. Especially at 3 am. I lost half my hair. I experienced bouts of inexplicable dread. Started having panic attacks. (Today, I know I was burned out and depressed, but that is a retrospective kind of wisdom.)
Over the following months, I started seeking and experimenting. I tried different therapeutic modalities. Revived my meditation practice. Experimented with a bunch of supplements and micro-dosing. Started intermittent fasting. Gave journalling a try. Napped religiously. Experienced nature in a new dimension. Quit coffee (gasp). Read more books in 6 months than in the past 6 years. Started to slow my pace down to an amble. (Now you know where this is going!)
Over time, I got curious about the science behind all these practices. I scoured research papers from top neuroscience and applied psychology labs. I wanted to understand what were evidence-based ways for finding more calm.
After a while, I noticed a pattern. Across the studies, expert opinions, books, podcasts, friends’ experiences, and my own. Living a calmer life seemed to mean actually living a more aligned and present life.
Doing what we actually want to be doing, feeling what we’re actually feeling, knowing what we actually know we know
Getting to a place of that deep knowing starts with being more present - for yourself first, then for others
Over the past year, I’ve had to unlearn and unwind from a decade of big hustling and deep grinding. I’ve had to learn to walk slowly. To stand up for my needs. To be more present. To hear what isn't being said. To trust my gut.
amble is my personal rebellion. Against a culture of workaholism. Against unrealistic standards of productivity. Against the never-ending “scroll”. Against the idea that “more is better”.
I have no illusion that I’m somewhere at the very beginning of my own path to self-knowing or to a life of presence.
But… “We teach best what we most need to learn”, right? I think Richard Bach is right on this one.
amble is my way of sharing what I learn in the rabbit holes I explore. amble is a way to build a liminal community I myself need.
If you're a lifelong seeker and grower - amble is for you.
If you're tired of the productivity-obsessed, hustle culture - amble is for you.
If you're in a moment of transition and the path forward isn't exactly clear or straightforward - amble is for you.
I promise to bring you a mash-up of neuroscience, applied psychology, somatics, mindfulness, and beyond - all in a bite-sized format. I promise to bring more "here & now" into your every day.
A new amble drops when I’ve felt called to it. I write when I feel like it. Part of my flow practice. Rejecting any sort of sense of obligation with this work. Subscribe for free here.
And once you do - please know that I love getting unvarnished reactions to my writing. So hit reply when you get the amble essay. I want to hear your thoughts, questions, and wonderings. This is the fuel that stokes my fire for discovery, learning, and experimentation.
Thank you for being here.
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